the light of dance and breath

It began as a way to survive,
the control and restriction,
the self punishment and starvation.
It was a way to stay small...on so many levels.
A secret and slow fading away.

At times, I truly thought it was a kind of
freedom.
A freedom from everyone else's way.
A freedom from the right way, the only way.
But now I see it was actually the opposite,
chains, a cage, clipping my wings so there could be
no chance of flight.

In the midst of the control, fear and self-loathing
I found movement with breath,
strength in the slow, steady beat of my heart,
beauty in my imperfectly perfect self.
I found yoga.
Thank you Universe
for sending me the light of dance
and breath....
for finding a way to connect my heart to my body
and my soul to my truth.

In yoga I have become a woman who loves her own body,
the way it feels when I reach for the sky with my fingertips...
the way it feels as I hug the earth with my belly and heart.
I have become a woman who delights in the sensation of
sweat slipping down my skin,
heart pounding in my chest
and the breath leading each moment.
Each breath is leading me to
a deeper connection to freedom.

If life before yoga was empty and starving
it's now full of light, love, laughter and play...
It's full of movement, growth and an ever expanding
desire to leave the old layers behind.
As I move and flow I release the chains
and unlock the cage around my heart.
In yoga I am more connected to my
playful spirit and the call of my wild beautiful soul.

I no longer need the control of my anorexic mind.
The power her voice once held is gone and instead
I hear music.
It's the song of freedom
and I'm dancing
dancing
dancing
with gratitude for this life.


Love from Oz.
All Rights Reserved - Chrissy Beth
 

You are enough. Right now.

 Yesterday I had a young woman in my class who was practicing yoga for the first time. She was lovely, trying everything the best she could and taking it all in with a smile. After class, we talked for a while and she had a few questions. She looked quite radiant and fresh and I felt like I could see her yoga skin start to grow right before my eyes.

At one point, she said to me, "as you can see, I need to lose a lot of weight...will this help me to lose weight?" I was taken aback by this assumption that I should "see" that she needs to lose weight, as if I was thinking this already when truth be told I had no thoughts about her weight, only thinking how amazing she was during her first class. After being caught off guard, I talked a bit about balancing out the metabolism and mentioned that I personally don't like scales/numbers when striving for better health. I said that she would gain strength, would tone her muscles and maybe she'd notice her clothes would fit differently. But later, as I thought back to our conversation, I had some regret. I wish I would have said what I was really thinking.

This is what I wish I would have said: 

You are enough. 

You are beautiful, right now, in this moment. 

You are making steps to be a better you and that is amazing and inspiring. 

I am inspired by you. 

You are unique.

And beautiful.

You are enough. 

That is what I would say to her right now, if she were to ask me again...and it's what I feel about each person that comes to class. We are all simply striving to be a better version of ourselves as we step onto our mats. And to me, that is enough. That is beautiful.

Love from Oz.

This is for all of the women

This is for all of the women.
This is for you.
Yes, it's for you dear sister, friend,
mother, wife, daughter and lover.

For the ones who are never satisfied
with the image looking back at them.
This is for your struggle,
the constant struggle!
to be something different,
to be like her....or her...even her.
Anything but you, yourself, the image looking back at you.

This is for the minutes, hours, days, nights...
is it a lifetime?
of trying to change, fix, perfect your already beautiful being.
This is for those moments spent (wasted)
starving, binging, purging, planning...
How long will you believe the lies? (those voices)
It's already been too long, too many minutes, my friend.

This is your life, now, it's here sister!
The voices, the demons, of course they will try to drag you down.
But listen, there will always be people out there ready
to pull you up, to hold you up, embrace, to love, love, love you up.
I love you, I see you,
all of your beauty,
your one and only kind of beauty.

This is for all of the women,
a call of sorts,
look up!
Yes, it's for you too.
You are strong and beautiful and fierce and so much more than you realize.
This is for you.
We can hold each other up, together,
here, take my hand.
I see you, your one and only kind of beauty.

 *       *      *      *       *        *      *      *      *        *       *       *       *       *       *       *       *

If you or someone you know has an eating disorder, please talk to someone, it's time. Don't wait any longer. 

http://thebutterflyfoundation.org.au/


Love from Oz.