Sacred Love

Bali Sun Worship

Sacred Earth,
Sun blessings

Sacred touch,
Skin to skin vows

Sacred sea,
sparkling light

Sacred moments,
with you.

a wild broken heart

She wondered if she would
ever grow tired of
the quiet cracking, splitting, breaking
of her heart.
Each rip a reminder (a caution of sorts)
that she was well and truly
breakable...
Fragile, if she was being honest.

Some might say she was
foolish,
a naive woman with
a wild, broken heart.

She wondered if they might be right.
Maybe a lock made sense
or a cage to keep
connection at bay.
A simpler way to live..
and this way meant less risk of
shattered pieces,
less chance of
broken fragments
scattered with yet another
lost love.

So she tried living in the cage
and she locked up her
wild, broken heart.
But it was never meant
to be tamed.
It kept her awake
with songs of
freedom and longing
and love.

She understood that her heart knew better
and in that moment
there was no cage or lock,
no bars or armour
to guard her
achingly beautiful,
eternally hopeful
wild, broken heart.

And she knew that
she would never grow tired of this
endless dance,
this miraculous journey lead by her
powerful heart compass.

Some might call her journey dangerous,
even say she was crazy...
but she would choose
wild and free,
love and light,

over a life with a cage any day.
She would choose a wild, broken heart.

Love from Oz.

the light of dance and breath

It began as a way to survive,
the control and restriction,
the self punishment and starvation.
It was a way to stay small...on so many levels.
A secret and slow fading away.

At times, I truly thought it was a kind of
freedom.
A freedom from everyone else's way.
A freedom from the right way, the only way.
But now I see it was actually the opposite,
chains, a cage, clipping my wings so there could be
no chance of flight.

In the midst of the control, fear and self-loathing
I found movement with breath,
strength in the slow, steady beat of my heart,
beauty in my imperfectly perfect self.
I found yoga.
Thank you Universe
for sending me the light of dance
and breath....
for finding a way to connect my heart to my body
and my soul to my truth.

In yoga I have become a woman who loves her own body,
the way it feels when I reach for the sky with my fingertips...
the way it feels as I hug the earth with my belly and heart.
I have become a woman who delights in the sensation of
sweat slipping down my skin,
heart pounding in my chest
and the breath leading each moment.
Each breath is leading me to
a deeper connection to freedom.

If life before yoga was empty and starving
it's now full of light, love, laughter and play...
It's full of movement, growth and an ever expanding
desire to leave the old layers behind.
As I move and flow I release the chains
and unlock the cage around my heart.
In yoga I am more connected to my
playful spirit and the call of my wild beautiful soul.

I no longer need the control of my anorexic mind.
The power her voice once held is gone and instead
I hear music.
It's the song of freedom
and I'm dancing
dancing
dancing
with gratitude for this life.


Love from Oz.
All Rights Reserved - Chrissy Beth
 

connection

Connection

Everyone wants it but so many are scared of it.
You find it and then you run away.
Fear, holding you back.
You smash into it and it knocks you off of your feet.
it's powerful, the stuff of electricity,
the stuff of eye meets eye and not looking away.
Because you see my soul and I see yours
and I'd like to dive in deeper.

Often the connection gets lost in your head
which tries to sort out, rationalize, arrange and
make sense of this strange and beautiful energy buzz,
this 'I met you yesterday but I've known you always' sort of feeling.
You knew me before, your head will tell you otherwise but
your heart is right.
Your heart knows the truth.

So for some this is when it's time to
lock up the heart, put up the gate, close the door. (Quick, slam it shut!)
Too much, too scary, too strong....
too familiar.
Safer to stay in your head, to look away,
avert your gaze...
Especially when you were just about to dive in deeper.
Careful, cautious, best to stay on the same path
so you know what's coming, no unexpected turns or bumps.

Everyone else seems to be doing okay
with their familiar path
and averted eyes
but I want more.
There's so much more than okay.
This life is too short and
I'm not everyone else.

I've unlocked my heart and my door is open
and I see you.
I see your beauty and your mess and
I feel the pain you've been holding onto for too long.
I feel scared too but I'd rather the fear than
no connection at all.
I'd rather the risk and the jump
than the safety net.

This is the stuff of real life,
the connections we make,
the risks we take and it's electric.
Electric authenticity when you hold my gaze
and take my hand
and dive in deeper.

Love from Oz.

All right reserved - Chrissy Beth. 2015

the quiet call

 I hear a quiet call...

I know you hear it too...
It starts as a whisper,
so soft you think you're imagining it.
Yet you stop, straining to understand
The sound, so powerful yet muffled.

It's a call to your bones,
your heart
your skin
your soul
your whole being,
an awakening.
it's time.


It's the call of who you've always been,
a reminder of sorts....
for you've forgotten along the way.
And when you look down,
the chains are heavy, so heavy
and you feel them
dragging you along.

Your heart longs to crack open wide,
wide, so wide...
Your feet long to run, so fast and far.
Your body aches for the fire,
shaking with passion,
trembling with desire.

The call is no longer quiet
and the sound fills your entire being.
You try to contain it,
the wild dance brewing in your soul,
your eyes wide, your skin tingling.
Your dance is fierce...
beautiful, sweaty and strange all at once
and as you move
the chains of an appropriate life crumble,
dust to the earth.


Your wings open wide,
reaching and stretching and remembering
that flight is inevitable.
You forgot what this felt like,
the power and strength of your freedom.
Your feet float ever so slowly off of the ground
As you begin to take flight...
Light and peaceful.

I hear a quiet call
for the wild, strange soul dance
inside of me, (inside of you)
and the flight of freedom
in my wings.
it's time.

I know you hear it too...


Love from Oz.


All rights reserved. Chrissy Beth

This one's for the misfits.

This one's for the misfits.
The freaks,
The weirdos.
The ones who can't seem to fit the mold. No matter how hard they try.
And you've tried hard.
This one's for anyone who keeps striving to follow the formula society has fed you but
Can't. Quite. Make. It. Work.

So you look for an escape...
Drugs, alcohol, sex, work, violence, pills, food....anything to make you feel less wild, less freakish...
Or just to feel less.
You think, numb is what I want.
Numb will make me normal.

Numb from the wild, beautiful beating of your heart.
Numb from that knowing that you aren't supposed to settle for this one way.
You know there's so much more, so many different ways.
Numb from all that you desire and all that you see...
Numb from the pain of trying to be someone you're not.

This one's for the misfits.
This one's for the beautiful souls that bring colour to our world.
Your rainbow is brilliant and we need more of your colour.
This one's for the freaks,
In all of your glorious light. So much light.
Why do you keep covering it up?
Let it shine bright.

Now's the time to be you,
the weird, wild, freakishly unique being that you are.
Normal is not part of your journey, normal is not what you're made of, not your calling.
Normal isn't going to bring you happiness or peace
and it certainly won't fill your heart with love. (they'll try to say I'm crazy but you know I'm right)

Screw normal.
Embrace your strange  and your freak and your fantastically colourful soul.
You're so much more than you realise.
Screw numb.
There's so much to feel and see and taste and touch.
So much to breathe in and out and to dream and imagine.
So much life to live and love to give.

This one's for the weirdos.
You are not alone and you are loved.

Love from Oz.

the words

I think there is so much more
to say to you.
The words get lost
lost
lost
in the wake up
get up
get going
hurry
of the day.
And I'm scared
we will be
lost
so lost
if I don't find
the words.

you take up so much space

There are people who have come into my life
and made their own space,
a room of sorts,
and they decorate it with their own pictures,
a table, some books, a few items that say
I am here
for a while.
Some people take a seat on the couch
and linger
for a cup of coffee...
but they don't bring any chairs or pictures.
They might carry a mug for the visit
but they take it with them when they leave.
There have been some who just needed to take something
from my life, so I gave them a few of
my blankets, my favorite plates, my bookshelf.
Maybe I gave them more than they deserved
but I didn't know that at the time.
These people sometimes leave
marks on the walls, scratches on the floor,
a mess in your heart.

But you...
You are building a home in my life.
Not a room, not a spot on the couch,
but your own home.

You take up so much space,
sometimes it scares me, so vast,
but the most beautiful space...
so different than the others.
There are windows and light and
it's always changing, growing and
you bring
more of yourself here each day.
It doesn't feel crowded or stuffy
even in the darkest of times.

It's warm, cozy...
safe and strange all at once...
and I never want you to take your pictures,
your coffee mug,
or any of the pieces of you.
Bring everything.
Stay.
Stay for longer than a while.

wide open

Only a short time left...do I rejoice or cry?
On the way to the studio today, walking along the streets before
the chaos, the people, the traffic
I feel a rush of emotion and my eyes are suddenly
wet.
This place has dug deep and
buried herself inside me in ways I don't even understand.
Altered me.
Scared and angered me and then
amazed and blessed and humbled me.
As I near the end of this adventure,
dear India,
may my eyes stay wide open,
open my eyes.
May my heart stay wide open,
open my heart.

 
Love from India